Leave Me Here, I'll Be Fine

[Image description: Photo taken by Emily of a building and a flower bush in Spain.]
           
Cover photo and poem by Emily Bourne.

Today I wanted to share a poem that I wrote in a fever and makes no sense. The title is inspired by a post on Risen Zine. You can find the post here: ‘Leave Me Here I’ll Be Fine’, a photo series by Gabi.

Leave me here, I’ll be fine

Leave me in a Savannah Brown poem
I want to be a mole in the side of the hill
Left alone, not worrying about space or small talk
Take me away from my life like a Cy Twombly painting
I’m sick of everyone putting their two pence in 
But not ever really understanding

My mind spins 
I want to be the perfection of Robbie and Cecilia
But instead experience the destruction like a 13 year old sister caused
When I’m sad I think about how I have no one or nowhere to miss
No time to miss not anything not dreams or old beliefs
Instead I think about how my boyfriend was brought up to believe in dragons
And I grew up believing books were boring and sat alone and didn’t really mind

I think about that time i thought my boyfriend’s heart beat too loud
And he said he used to think his own heartbeat was soldiers marching on the roof
But soldiers marched into war, every step was one closer to death
I wanted to make him feel alive, not like he was dying

He told me that his heart didn’t beat too loud
So maybe it was my heart all along.

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For more of Emily’s content, you can follow her on instagram: @floteren